As a parent, at times you feel that the day is filled with ceaseless stream of backtalk from the kids. Isn?t? You hear it when you ask them to do daily chores or stop them from watching TV or when you lay down the rules. It is one of the worst exhausting things that as a parent, we deal with while raising the kids. Wondering what prompts backtalk? It is the sense of frustration and powerlessness. Kids like adults don?t like to feel weak and when as a parent, you tell them ?No? they feel as if something is taken away from them. The urge to fill the void results in backtalk. This makes kids say almost instantly, ?That?s not fair!? But as a parent, you know that it is your duty to make your child accept the rationality of the decisions and also follow the rules. Some of the tips to deal with the kids that backtalk are:
As a parent, you can help them fill this void by providing continuous support and guidance to set the clear boundaries of what behavior is acceptable and what is not. And also explain them the consequences of engaging in the behavior that is not allowed.
Do not yell or threaten the kids as it will escalate the matters and make it worse. In case you feel the child is losing control, let her know that you will continue the conversation later and politely walk away. Later come and ask what actually is bothering them?
One golden rule is not to negotiate with your child as this will give your kids the urge to argue more the next time around.
Backtalk is often the result of teenagers trying to assert their independence so as a parent help them make choices that are within your boundary limits. Let the kids be responsible for their own behavior. Even if that means, bearing up with negative consequences.
When your kids say ?You don?t understand me!? don?t frustrate them further by saying ?I went through it too.? By asserting your stance of ?been there, done that? which irritates the kids, respond by saying, ?I might not understand, but really want to know what you are feeling.? Ask the kids, if they are not comfortable talking, they might write an email explaining what they truly want.
Watch your tone and the way you treat people near you. If you are rude or sarcastic to people around you, the kids will pick the same tone. Believe it or not, you are the kids biggest influence. Accept if you make a mistake while treating people, as it will make the kid feel that they are less under attach and open to adjustments.
Sit down or take your child to a mall or drive or museum and try and strike a communication that you are not happy with the way your relationship is progressing lately. And tell them that you want to do something nice together where nobody will be rude or sarcastic. In case any of you break the pact, leave the activity for the day and start again tomorrow.
Respect begets respect, so give your kids the same respect that you would like to have. Refrain from the habit of name calling such as ?spoiled brat? or ?nuisance to home? etc. Rather, focus on the behavior you will like to change.
In case all these suggestions fail, it is best to seek advice from professionals as it is essential to break the habit of backtalk not only for his personal but also professional and social growth.?